The Twilight of Our Idols

[this article was originally posted to my Facebook page in June 2015]

I can remember hearing, on my car radio in 1997, of the death of actor Jimmy Stewart.  Two things immediately came to my 29 year-old mind:

* "I kind of thought he would live forever"
* "I feel sad for my parents' generation"

Today, nearly 20 years later, we learn of the death of actor Christopher Lee. It has been a long time since I could forget that even famous people pass away.  And the sorrow I feel this time is for my own generation's loss.

We see them now a little more often than we saw them before, don't we?  The online posts about heaven gaining another angel.   It could be a pet.  It could be a classmate.  It is, with increasing regularity, a cherished relative of the previous generation or a parent.

And, here we are: the 40-something masters of the universe, agog and bewildered that the people we all looked up to for so long are turning over the keys to the kingdom, increasingly, to us.  I marvel at how many of us announced their children's graduations from high school this year.  We have now produced a new generation of adults that look up to us the way we looked up to our parents (whether that's been clear over the previous several years or not).  Many of them will have felt, on learning of the death of Christopher Lee, the way I felt when learning of the death of Jimmy Stewart.

So, besides evoking a sense of poignancy with these observations, what is my point?  Simply this: Life waits for no one.  We, the remnants of the Baby Boomers and the vanguard of Generation X, find ourselves, finally, in the driver's seats of our worlds.  No more hand holding; no more training wheels.  We are now "they", "them" -- "those people" who, increasingly over the next two decades or so, get to say how our families, our neighborhoods, our governments, and our society will go.  There is no longer the shadow of someone greater than us hiding us from our moment in the spotlight.

Seize the scepter - lay hold on the empty throne.  Our idols have grown frail and are abandoning us.  We 'get to say' now; it is our turn to be looked up to.

Announcing My Name Change

On this day, January 13, 2014, the day before I achieve 46 years on the earth since my birth -- I discard all names previously given to me or taken by myself and I choose and embrace a new name, Mark Donohue Valor.

tldr; Because I can; because the new name pleases me.  All the world's a stage, and I have changed my stage name.

To the more interested:  One year ago, I journaled that, on the way to embracing Transcendentalism (the affirmation that everything is eternal spirit, with the physical world as a transient illusion), I discovered that Materialism (the affirmation that everything is physical, with the spiritual world as a transient illusion) was the underlying reality of the universe.  I've had 12 months to try out this mental 'suit of clothes'.  Each passing day since has served only to strengthen this conviction.  In the English summary of the ancient words of the Roman poet Lucretius: "There are atoms, and the void, and nothing else".  Far from bringing any sense of depression or despair, this understanding has opened up a new and exciting life of wonder, joy, and personal growth for me.  I wholeheartedly embrace it and already inject it into every expression of what I say, do, and create.  I am such a different person today than I have been in the preceding two decades that it would rather be a fraud NOT to express myself by changing my name.

Honestly, I never was a "Buddy", a "Bernard" or a "Bernie" in my own mind.  Loving, wonderful people hung these monikers on me to give me a good start in life.  Each of these names has served to identify a particular epoch of my life through the years as I worked through important transitions -- from the meek child, to the scrappy young man elbowing his place at life's table, to the hopeful seeker of profound meaning.  I freely confess that each of these past phases of my life has taken longer, far longer, than it has for some of my contemporaries.  Yet, at each transition, I wrung more and more traces of magical thinking from the fabric that is my life.

And further:  When I was young, my family used to travel to Indiana in a motor home to watch auto races.  The very first 'idol' I ever had in my life was a thrilling race car driver named Mark Donohue.  He dominated every racing circuit he drove in.  He fundamentally changed the rules of racing with his knowledge of physics and his willingness to tinker and experiment with the mechanics of his racing cars.  The title of his autobiography is "Unfair Advantage".  He died as he lived while practicing for the Austrian Grand Prix in 1975, immortalized at the top of his game like Bruce Lee, Jimi Hendrix, and Buddy Holly  To this day I am moved and inspired by his life.

If you insist on calling me by the name you knew when you first met me, I'm probably not going to knock myself out correcting you.  Those who matter most to me understand that this is just as big an event for me as someone else's christening or marriage.

Fall 2013 US Economic Prediction

I am beginning to convince myself that the US economy is headed for a 3-5 year window of high sustained growth. Here are a few reasons why:

Recall that 2008 was the last year that people with terrible credit could obtain easy housing credit. 2008 + 5 is 2013, which means that this is the last year that banks have to deal with uncertainty about large numbers of borrowers with cheaper 5-year Adjustable Rate mortgages going through foreclosure. The orderly winding down of these toxic assets will enable local and national banks to open up their reserves for legitimate business lending more freely.

Also, competition for high-tech workers is really heating up in the job market. I'm getting the kinds of unsolicited phone calls and emails I got back in 1998 and 2005. Yes, this portends a future bubble-burst, but one that is several years out, with the actual, you know, bubble, in the meantime.

Finally, the stock market has shown uncanny resilience in the face of multiple fiscal crises from Washington over the past 10 months. The right kind of stocks are heading in the right direction: temporary worker companies like Manpower and for-profit education companies like DeVry.

(disclaimer: I don't have any financial interest in either of the stocks mentioned except perhaps accidentally via my employer's 401(k) benefit)

The End of an Era: RIP Zig Ziglar

"You will get all you want in life if you help enough other people to get what they want."
-Zig Ziglar

With Zig Ziglar's death at age 86 today, an era has ended in the Personal Development world. Zig, Mary Kay Ash, and Jim Rohn were all inspired by a man named John Earl Shoaff who dazzled many with his wealth, lifestyle, and philosophy back in the 1960s. All three became inspirations to millions and earned great wealth as motivational speakers in the decades that followed.

Tony Robbins, Jack Canfield (Chicken Soup book series), Brian Tracy and literally hundreds of others who have tried their hand at motivational speaking or writing got their initial impetus from Zig, Mary Kay, and Jim. I myself owe a big debt of gratitude to Mr. Rohn for the difference his words made in my life. It is because of him that I became serious about journaling, goal setting, and taking responsibility for my own success in life regardless of upbringing or circumstances.

When I first heard Jim Rohn speak in 1993, my financial world was so small that I thought $20,000 per year was "making it". Although I was very bright at other subjects, understanding the concept that 'learning new skills that are in higher demand can lead to a high income' eluded me. I was waiting for God to bless me, the economy to get better, a relative to help me out, etc, etc. I guess God did bless me the day I heard Rohn say,

"Whatever happens in life happens to us all. Circumstances are like the wind that blows - you cannot control the wind. But your personal philosophy is like the set of the sail on the boat of your life. Don't wish for a better wind to blow, wish for the wisdom to set a better sail."

It took me a few years to get into this kind of thinking. My first, early goals were very timid. But then I got serious about learning skills and setting income goals (before I was even employed, other than as a waiter while going back to college). By 1997, I was making $32,000 per year. By 2000, I was making over $65,000 per year. Then over $80,000 in 2005 and in 2007, I crossed the six figure mark in anual salary (not including benefits) and have been in that vicinity ever since.

Did I get lucky? You bet I did. Nobody "called" the Internet boom back when I decided to go back to school for computer science in 1995. But there were enough hints of what was to come just by noticing the number of help-wanted ads in that field. That's where my intelligence helped out. But the fact is, I wouldn't even have thought to look at those ads or to re-train for a whole new field of work, if Jim Rohn hadn't spoken into my life.

Sometimes I wonder who will take up the 'influence' mantle of John Earl Shoaff for the people born in the '80s and '90s. Who will be the next generation of voices, perhaps inspired by Tony Robbins, Jack Canfield, Brian Tracy, Mark Victor-Hansen, or even Rhonda Byrne, Deepak Chopra, or Wayne Dyer? Maybe in the Internet age, with TED talks, blogs, YouTube lessons, and so on, a new, a more democratic day has dawned with fewer motivational "stars". That's fine. As long as the message gets out which challenges people similarly to these words, by John Earl Shoaff:

"Lets not be moons, the reflector of light. Lets be suns, the creator of light - the creator of ideas. Because we all have the capacity."

My First New Song In Over A Decade

Something about today being Good Friday unblocked a latent avalanche of creativity in me. This is the first new song I've written in over 10 years. The words "I used to cry when I heard you died" have been with me for much longer, but it just wasn't time to set them into jewelpiece of a whole song until now. Why now? Because instead of feeling desperation about them like I did in my 20s or contempt about them like I did in my 30s, I now feel a calm serenity.

Look What We've Done To You, Jesus
words and music by Bernard Valor
(c) 2012 All Rights Reserved

Look what we've done to you, Jesus
Look what we've done to the things you said
Chasing a ticket to heaven
We pass by your baskets of living bread

I used to cry when I heard you died
I used to cry, but now it feels, kind of cold inside -- 'cause all the preachers lied!

You taught us to love those who hate us
Asked us to turn the other cheek
But you must have been mistaken,
'Cause that'd only make us feel dumb and weak

We'd rather have the prize behind door number 3
Yeah, we'll take the the grace and all the mercy
Because you died on the tree --
Now won't you please let us be? [Ohhhhhh!]

Look what we've done to you, Jesus
Look what we've done to the words you said
Transformed you into a "savior"
Lost all the meaning you might have had

I used to cry when I heard you died
Nails in your hands, thorny crown,
Spear thrust in your side.
Yeah, that's why-y I cried

But that ain't the worst we did to you!
No -- we made you a god then we worshiped you.
Threw out the words that you taught us and made them a LIE....
We didn't even try!

Look what we've done to you Jesus

Cutting the Employment Cord

Yesterday was my last official day at EA Orlando, two weeks after I gave them notice. There was nothing wrong with the company or the position. It's just that I felt like I was going to burst unless I put myself "out there" and took a chance at creating a business of my own. I am fortunate to have money saved up so I could live on it for a few years (with a fairly tight budget) if I needed to.

I'm doing research on a handful of opportunities, all of them original business ideas. One of them is to emulate Fred DeLuca's (the founder of Subway Sandwiches) success by starting a fast food concept that can be refined into a system at one store, expanded locally, and later developed into a franchise opportunity. Another idea is to take my considerable expertise and create a new technology product or service - this would take more time but would have the potential for a much bigger payoff. You know me, I want it all - perhaps I can start the fast food shop, get it rolling with a good management team and then focus on developing the technology product.

Every job I've ever worked has been trouble simply because when I see ways for a company's processes to be improved I don't keep my mouth shut. On the contrary, I've been the epitome of the boy who called out, "The Emperor is naked!" It is only fair to the fine men and women who have had the challenge of trying to manage me that I remove myself from the employee pool and take a shot at being the Emperor. Interestingly - my way has worked out well when I've worked at startup companies where it's fine to chit-chat with the President and the Chief Technology Officer. I guess I just don't "get" turf wars and office politics - it all seems like a bunch of unnecessary friction that slows down the process of innovation and continuous improvement. I understand that there are many people who do "get" these things and who are willing to work around them in exchange for stable employment. I am very glad for such people - after all, my future companies are going to need managers and employees too.

In a way, it all boils down to this: Although I have finally come to accept that I cannot escape structure, I don't have to spend my life struggling against somebody else's structure. I have the option of creating my own structure - one that pleases me, one that I can live with and thrive in.

The Bigger Big Picture

One of the things I love about the age of the Internet is that we are no longer beholden to a single version of any given story. One who pays attention to this dynamic over a period of time comes to the conclusion that there is no one truth, no really objective voice out there. Unless you want to be content being spoon-fed by your favorite information provider, curiosity and intellectual rigor are required in order to come to reasonable, satisfying conclusions.

Take the current so-called economic "crisis". I have heard Barak Obama and other Democrats say that Republicans' penchant for deregulation has been the root cause of the irresponsible lending and opaque securitizing that led to our present difficulties. Interestingly enough, Republicans tried repeatedly in the last 15 years to increase regulation of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, only to be blocked at every turn by Democrats. Why would Democrats block stricter regulation of these government sponsored enterprises? They blocked regulation because they felt they had fought hard to ensure fairer mortgage lending to Americans through the various incarnations of the Community Reinvestment Act. Tightening Freddie and Fanny's capitalization requirements would have required stricter lending policies which were seen at the time to be a euphemism for denying credit access to under-served portions of the population.

Why were Democrats concerned that stricter lending policies would put fair house ownership opportunity in danger? Because stricter lending laws _had_ been used for this purpose in the past. The Community Reinvestment Act was sponsored in 1977 to counteract the practice of something called "redlining". Until then, many lending institutions would literally draw lines around low-income communities on municipal maps in red pen and automatically deny mortgage applications from these areas. This lazy, crude strategy for financial risk management meant that lower income whites were able to get loans that middle or upper income blacks and latinos could not obtain. Which tends to piss you off if you happen to be in the latter category.

Obviously, we could continue further back in history to see more examples of this kind of back and forth, but these two snippets are enough for the point I'd like to make: In both of these cases (lenders unfairly redlining and politicians being unwilling to effectively regulate) we have a group of people who were paralyzed from doing what was clearly reasonable due to an irrational fear that any movement in the "opposite" direction would cause some kind of cascading domino effect to an undesired outcome. What is ironic is that, in both examples, it was not the perceived enemy, but their own misguided obstinance that produced an outcome they were hoping to avoid.

Bankers have no one to blame for disruptive community organizations like ACORN but themselves. Indeed, they produced them. And Congressional Democrats could do well to take to heart the words of one of their own, Rep. Arthur Davis of Alabama, who recently said, "Like a lot of my Democratic colleagues I was too slow to appreciate the recklessness of Fannie and Freddie. I defended their efforts to encourage affordable homeownership when in retrospect I should have heeded the concerns raised by their regulator in 2004. Frankly, I wish my Democratic colleagues would admit when it comes to Fannie and Freddie, we were wrong."

What I am interested in is that we as a nation (and as a species) make progress toward noticing this tendency to irrational obstinancy and interrupt the pattern. It is not sufficient in any particular circumstance to say, "This is the situation I find myself in, I guess I'll just perpetuate it." It takes guts and a determination to transcend the mental paths of least resistance so that we can create the kind of world we'd all rather have. But nothing less that this makes anything worthwile of us.